This is what I was trying to go for in my first story, with the long sentences and long paragraphs, but reading Wallace's story just makes me feel like I failed miserably. That's okay, though.
These long sentences create a sense of panic and urgency. There are few periods where you can stop and think about what you just read. You keep reading and keep going, and this puts you in the mindset of the Daddy even though the point of view is detached.
That we can get inside the head of the Daddy without actually getting there is an accomplishment in Wallace's writing. But the detachment also let's us feel the fear that the Daddy feels, but in our own way. He doesn't give us gruesome details of skin falling off or anything like that. He gives us details like the steam rising from the kid, the water in the baby's diaper. He's using one of the best rules that they use in horror movies like Jaws (which for the purpose of the argument, is a horror movie). We don't see the shark until much later in the film, giving us time to picture the shark ourselves. And our minds always go to the worst things possible. Here, Wallace shows us details, but not the worst of it, so we have to picture it ourselves. We picture what the child's skin looks like under the diaper and we feel that pain. We picture how hot it really would be to have your skin steaming.
The one thing he want's to stand out, is the sentence, "If you've never wept and want to, have a child." It's short and concise and isn't like the rest of the piece. He wants that sentence to be the one to remember.
God, I love David Foster Wallace.
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